Writing healthy love is hard! Finding a balance between engaging conflict and fulfilling romance is not an easy task, but it is worthwhile. NaNoWriMo Programs Fellow, Riya Cyriac, offers insight, advice, and examples on how to write healthy relationships.

Throughout my time as a reader and a writer, I’ve encountered an abundance of romances that range from swoon worthy to absolutely disastrous. This is not discounting either end of the spectrum: they have their place. However, there seems to be a noticeable lack of representation for healthy, fulfilling relationships in literature. This is particularly evident in Young Adult literature, where the portrayal of healthy relationships is particularly essential. If you are interested in writing a healthy relationship and filling that void, here are some observations, suggestions, and tips to do that

Obsession and Anger are not Expressions of Healthy Love

As a young adult, I often read books that romanticized obsession and anger. If the love interest punched someone who shows interest in their partner, that is not an indication of passion or love. On the contrary, it should be a glaring red flag. If a character relentlessly pursues their love interest despite resistance, it is not love. It is an obsession, and a clear sign that the character views the other as their property. It’s tempting to use these actions as expressions of passion because it is easy and bold. 

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